Sunday, May 18, 2014

Once an Update


It's Mother's Day today, and it's Sunday. Well, i just realise how long have i didn't update my blog. 
I used to update it at least twice a month or so. Things changed, change. Same as for person. 
To be honest, I have extremely great fear of making friends, or close friends should I say.
I am not perfect. Well, I know no one in this world is. 
I don't call myself a generous person thou. I have a lot of imperfections. 
If you put me in a crowd of strangers, trust me, I'll only put myself in my position. 
Sometimes, I rather choose to do things alone, no matter how difficult it is. 
Well, except for some events/occasions, when I'm really having hard times and it's out of my zone. Then, thats the only time when reality forces me to move forward - away from my conform zone. 
It's not that I don't like to socialise, I do. It's just that I'm afraid of people left me or hurt me, whether directly or in a indirect way, when my true self is revealed.
 I know myself better than anyone else. 
My attitude, temper, bitch-ness etc. I want to keep people with me.
I want them to be my close friends. However, when one is close with one another, criticism issues tend to happen more. It ends, but again, happens.